Thursday, December 17, 2009

random thots.......

I just thot about this a spur of the moment thing:

The things I hate the most;
People spitting in the street
Some couples engaging in PDA (it looks unnatural)
People touching me needlessly
Someone standing close to me in a defined space when there is so much room
Chickens (I got chased by one when I was a child)*
That the baby clan is scattered around the world
Skinny babies
Being hungover
Waking up Monday morning
Man u and Barca

The things that scare me most;
Not having money
Having kids
Falling for any of my exes again
Not being able to get it up*

Monday, November 9, 2009

Miss Right


The best part of my day’s getting to see you or talk to you, you make a dull life (my dull) life brim with excitement, you make me believe things I didn’t used to and doubt those I did, you show me love’s magic and all the blessings it brings. I’d give up my hope for eternity for a night in your arms(though I already had that). The nightmares are a thing of the past you falling asleep in my arms us more than I ever hoped for, cos of you I can relate to Paris, Romeo, ”Clyde” , I used to think them stupid but knowing what i know now I’d fight for you, die for you, even rob a bank for you.
With you is where I’ll always want to be, my heart beats a tattoo it says my lucky charm, a ghra, mi amor, I love you (in 16 bars).

I’ve met a lot of girls seen so many faces,
But I’ve yet to meet a guy with whom I’d trade places,
Like a thoroughbred your love’s put me through my paces,
I can’t find the path to my past no traces.
I’ve finally gotten to understand what grace is,
Me loving you through life’s different phases.
P.S Baybee when you read it don’t leave a comment

Friday, October 23, 2009

she said "she's okay"

Its stormy in lagos on a cool april night, I come home from work to see my baby staring at the moonlight, shivering in the cold I ask her"what's the matter" she says "I'm okay".

We went out with friends, and this girl caught my eye started flirting,noticed my baby look my way, I could see her crying inside so i clean up my act and ask her "baby whats wrong" she says"I'm okay"

So we had our first kid and it was a girl but i was out with my friends while she put to bed i get there the day after and see her with tears in her eyes i ask her why the tears she said "I'm okay"

Our fifth year anniversary and I plum forgot came home and didnt get her a thing with lights turned down low a glass of wine in her hand she greets me at the door and said hapyy anniversary I just stand there with a dumb look on my face she shuts herself in the room and cries all night I stay by the door and tell her how sorry I am, tell her to give me a chance to be a better man.

That was thirty years ago if it was a day, and now she looks at me with love in her eyes so when she starts to tear and I ask her "why?" she says now I'm truly okay"

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

LOVE CONUNDRUMS

Hello blogsville this post is true every word of it, it’s a Tale of how lucky or unlucky my closest friends have been in love n.b this refers only to their relationships while we were in school

Jerry; this guy had an angel “l” for a love but like guys everywhere he blew it in love today out of it the next never did get the story on that one. He had another one “r” she was a girl who could make me wolf whistle and I don’t know how to whistle, but she was unfaithful so he in the words of b.i.g “cut the hooker off” but didn’t find someone nu.

Sam; the first memory I have of him is him holding onto “la” and swinging her around in his skinny arms but like everything else it went the way of all flesh. Next on the scene that we acknowledged was “Le” but we don’t do long distance so we let her go but I don’t think she knows yet.

Jboi; n/a he loved to play away matches.

Demo; bad guy extraordinaire he didn’t have any gf that I knew of but the guy got more !@# than china has people (a little exaggeration) one day he had this chick on speaker she didn’t know and next thing we know she was “helping herself out”.

Jd boy; this guy was a romantic to the core his first relationship was wiv a gal who had a higher iq than he did proud ibo boy he was he broke it of(lie) the next one ended the minute before he got on the plane to where he is @ right now.

Chinko; the dudes been seeing the same girl for like 5 years, he is as good as married.
So if u see any of these guys around you ladies please don’t be afraid to say hi.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Forever and a day

I remember it like it was yesterday the song that was on the radio what she wore every detail remains as fresh as it was a year ago. How she tilted her head and saidit was over and the reasons she gave. It's one year to the day todaysince she walked away she says she's found somebody nubut she still wondeers if i've got somebody to,so I told her the truth that since she's been gone there have been a couple of girls but I learnt my last lesson well after all she taught me.
So this is for my next wifey wherever you are please be gentle.....

random,i.guess

Whats up blogsville, It’s been quite q while but I was waiting till I had sthg to say, I went for this job test last week, and I could see that the economic crunch is biting hard, see people looking for jobs like 40,000 people were there for like 50 openings people were now asking me what the questions were can you imagine come see snitching now giving people wrong info was like every bodies fave past time,800 to 1 what were they expecting with odds like that mscheew.

I met up wiv this girl she’s my boy’s (sam) babe’s friend, so I saw her in FB she wasn’t looking all that but when I met her in the flesh brrrrrr! Let’s just say I won’t be single for long she set die she’s so brazen plus she likes hanky panky which I like as well. A lot of my guys have ratings for girls like a point system score 1 for this deduct two for that for me nothing like that I believe man has 3 parts body, spirit, and soul girls dat stimulate my body are a dime a dozen they are the flings, the ones who can stimulate my soul are my girlfriends but the one dat can stimulate my spirit is the one I’m gonna walk down the aisle so for me you either have it or you don’t. Now this girl Body(check) Soul(check) Spirit(hell no) so for the next couple of months or weeks I’m off the flesh market lol.

It’s been almost 3 months since I last tasted alcohol I’m starting to forget what it tastes like so tomorrow I’m gonna call up my friends and just go chill somewhere and drown somebody’s sorrows lol. I wonder if it’s possible to forget how to have sex like if u don’t do it for a while do you just forget how or does it come back to you I would have done a survey but all the boys I know are regular as clockwork so I guess I’ll keep on wondering until one of them gets married, cos they wouldn’t be doing it in a regular.

Spoke to my cuz sometime ago he just got back from summer in yankee and he says he hooked up wiv girls on trains in buses and I got to thinking that I have never hooked up wiv a girl while using such modes of transportation it just doesn’t sound right like I’m in a bus and the conductor Is yelling for passengers in Naija IT JUST DOESN’T SOUND RIGHT , right?

I’m on FB and I see one of my little sisters the girls got like 2 tattoos she’s second to the last If my Pops sees it he is gonna commit a crime(shiverssss)and my Pops seems to know everything we do on FB, once he calls me and says “check so and so’s profile “ I do so and I see status “I’m f@#$^*g high” Pops is like we’ll see how he gets high when I cut off is allowance just like that,so I just gave myself brain my status on FB since then have been innocuous.
This goes out to Scribbles who used to be called THE G______ "no matter where you go make you no forget are o!". lol

Monday, September 14, 2009

Friends, FAKE OR REAL


FAKE FRIENDS: Never ask for food.
REAL FRIENDS: is the reason you have no food.

FAKE FRIENDS: Call your parents Mr / Mrs
REAL FRIENDS: Call your parents DAD/MOM


FAKE FRIENDS: never seen you cry
REAL FRIENDS: cry with you

FAKE FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back
REAL FRIENDS: keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours

FAKE FRIENDS: know a few things about you
REAL FRIENDS: Could write a book about you with direct quotes from you

FAKE FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that is what the crowd is doing
REAL FRIENDS: Will kick the whole crowds butt that left you

FAKE F RIENDS: Would knock on your front door
REAL FRIENDS: Walk right in and say 'I'M HOME!'

FAKE FRIENDS: Are for awhile
REAL FRIENDS: Are for life

FAKE FRIENDS: will talk bad to the person who talks bad about you.
REAL FRIENDS: Will knock the person out that talked bad about you

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Good for a couple of laughs

Witty one-liners

Dickson's Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure
you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it.
If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a
replacement.

Sex is like air; it's not important unless you aren't getting any.

Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

One good turn gets most of the blankets.

There are two kinds of pedestrians -- the quick and the dead.

Life is sexually transmitted.

An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.

If quitters never win, and winners never cheat, then who is the fool who
said "Quit while you're ahead"?
(my fave)

ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI.

Willie was a Chemist, But Willie is no more, What Willie thought was
H20 Was H2SO4.

A closed mouth gathers no feet.

Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere.

Jury -- Twelve people who determine which client has the better
lawyer.

Never lick a gift horse in the mouth.

The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second
marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.

Before marriage, a man yearns for the woman he loves. After marriage,
the 'Y' becomes silent.

If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every
word you say, talk in your sleep.

These funny lines are real! Imagine how everyone was obliged to remain calm and orderly during the exchange.
Attorney: Are you sexually active?
Witness: No, I just lie there.

Attorney: What is your date of birth?
Witness: July 18th.
Attorney: What year?
Witness: Every year.

Attorney: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
Witness: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

Attorney: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
Witness: I forget.
Attorney: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?


Attorney: How old is your son, the one living with you?
Witness: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Attorney: How long has he lived with you?
Witness: Forty-five years.


Attorney: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
Witness: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Attorney: And why did that upset you?
Witness: My name is Susan.


Attorney: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo?
Witness: We both do.
Attorney: Voodoo?
Witness: We do.
Attorney: You do?
Witness: Yes, voodoo.


Attorney: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
Witness: Did you actually pass the bar exam?


Attorney: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old,
how old is he?
Witness: Uh, he's twenty-one.


Attorney: Were you present when your picture was taken?
Witness: Would you repeat the question?


Attorney: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: And what were you doing at that time?
Witness: Uhm...


Attorney: She had three children, right?
Witness: Yes.
Attorney: How many were boys?
Witness: None.
Attorney: Were there any girls?


Attorney: How was your first marriage terminated?
Witness: By death.
Attorney: And by whose death was it terminated?


Attorney: Can you describe the individual?
Witness: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Attorney: Was this a male or a female?


Attorney: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your Attorney?
Witness: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.

!
Attorney: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?
Witness: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.


Attorney: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
Witness: Oral.


Attorney: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
Witness: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Attorney: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
Witness: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!


Attorney: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
Witness: Huh?


Attorney: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Witness: No.
Attorney: Did you check for blood pressure?
Witness: No.
Attorney: Did you check for breathing?
Witness: No.
Attorney: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
Witness: No.
Attorney: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
Witness: Because his brain was sitting in a jar on my desk.
Attorney: But nevertheless could the patient have still been alive?
Witness: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law


Dinner on Hooters Flight
It was mealtime during a flight on Hooters Airline.
"Would you like dinner?" the flight attendant asked
John, seated in front.
"What are my choices?" John asked.
"Yes or no," she replied.

Boarding Pass
A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat, she said,
"Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

Frozen Turkeys
A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy,
"Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

Speeding Kid
The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said.
The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could."
When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

Bridge Delivery
A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it, the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?"
The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

Sexual Exhaustion
A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam.
"Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury, illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it,no other excuses whatsoever!"
A smart-ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says,
"Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

I have shaken of my melancholy, if relationships were swimming pools then please get me a life guard.So I'm thinking I should change the name of my blog to something with a little more dash hmmmmmm?

Friday, September 4, 2009

One year


A lot can change in a second, but this last year I learnt how much things, even when they change, actually still remain the same.

Its been one year;
one year since I stopped to smile,
one year where each step seemed like a mile.
one year since my sky turned gray,
one year since she walked away.
one year since she left my side,
one year spent bleeding inside.
one year spent with the darkest thoughts,
one year getting to know how much love hurts.
onw year dying a little everyday,
one year with my heart broken in 365 ways.
one year wishing she'd come back,
one year hoping she'll banish the dark.
one year dying to kiss her hair,
one year longing to whisper sweet nothings in her ear.
one year praying for God to take away this pain,
one year yearning to make love to her again.
one year spent all alone,
one year in which my house ceased to be my home.
one year and my sky is still blue,
one year and I'm still loving you.

Thursday, August 27, 2009

Dark and Deep pt2

Pain calls me brother, Fear knows me by name, sorrow I know like no other, Anger and I are one and the same, Loneliness is my companion, Darkness inhabits my soul, Deception my way of life, sowing seeds of hate and strife.
Living life behind my masks, all you see is a facade, just when they think they have me figured out, something else is revealed. The only constant in life is me,never changing, friends come and they go, people are born and others die, relationships once strong are broken, and all thats left are echoes of what once was.
I am what I am and that wont change for anyone.
Through pain I gained relief, from fear I have found courage, from sorrow I have the full measure of joy, with anger I have learnt restraint, from loneliness a thorough understaning of the word friendship, In Darkness I finally found light, Deception taught me the value of truth,Friends come and go that's true but that maybe they weren't made to be there in the first place, Relationships broken need not be reforged, I am what I am unyielding but flexible, firm but reasonable, finally able to change.
"Blessed are the hearts that can bend they shall never be broken"Albert Camus

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Dark and Deep

When I walk out of your life,
will you think of me,
or will you wish we had never met?
When i Walk out that door,
will you be waiting for me to ring the bell,
or will you change the lock,
and say "you are not welcome here"?
When I say goodbye,
will that be the end,
or the rebirth of a love never ending?
When I die will anybody miss me,
or will they move on,
forgetting they ever met me?
When I have nothing,
will you be there for me,
or would you be gone,
like hope is for so many?
When you are sad,
and feeling blue,
someone,somewhere is thinking of you.

Friday, August 21, 2009

What's the fuss about love......


This is going to be the longest post I have ever written it’s about a boy and a girl who made the mistake of thinking that love was all that mattered but like everything that was too good to be true it was a lie, so here goes.

HER; How do you put a love story all in one blog from the first time we met to the last time we kissed, and everything in between. He stood a little over 6ft, dark skinned, with a killer smile(wink wink) true he wasn’t sculpted like a greek god but on the court every other athlete paled in comparison he was fast, strong, he was a "god". Falling in love with him was so easy, he was mine and I was his baybee, when he held me , it was like no one else existed but us two, even now I still hear our song “I was made to love you, my hands to touch you , my arms to hold you” He never asked me out but he kissed my forehead in front of the whole school, I never felt like that with anybody. The first time we kissed was magical, I didn’t want to come up for air. He was and always will be my first even though he doesn’t know it,And i may never be able to say it to him.

HIM; When you fall in love, all people talk about is the good part, how you become complete, how it conquers all etcetera etcetera. They never tell about the heartache, or the pain how after you are transported to the heights you could be sent crashing down, with your heart broken in pieces, your pride in tatters, and your whole world torn apart, and it seems the sun will never shine again. I was watching a video she made for me, and I thought I was over her, but the sad fact is, I’m still in love, how come I still wonder, me who has always been capable of loving and leaving now finds it hard to forget about a girl and walk away some would say it’s cos she did the walking away others would say that I have finally grown up, that’s what my Big brother told me he said Only a man can feel such hurt and still care.
And I think I wish I were still a boy, how does love end, what do you have to do to turn love into whatever this is back then we culd hang out all day and not say more than 3 words to each other but it was okay, but now we fill conversations with meaningless talk trying to produce a facsimile of what once was. On the 5th of may 2008, she said our love would last forever and a day, (I guess forever and a day doesn’t last so long in her book) for the first time that I could remember I felt like I could do something worthwhile. People never knew what was in my head all they saw was this fine boy who loved to laugh and play the field but she saw past all that to the child who hated his father, who before he turned 18 spent 2 years not talking to him, who thought having a family wasn’t worth it, who thought he could never hack it as a husband, talk less as a father, until she came along, and for the first time in a long time she gave me back hope she wanted me just me, and it was enough it took me like 4 months to screw up the courage to kiss her and once I did I didn’t want to kiss any other we were together for over a year and not once did I even think about another girl, how do you walk away from that.

She always wanted me to stop drinking ironic how when we broke up she drove me to drink but now I can’t even stand the taste of beer and here I am writing this even though she never gets to read it. I finally understand the story of troy how a whole nation went to war because of a woman cos for her I’d probably do the same. I remember my last hookup some 6 months ago and while I was having sex I called out her name. My friends would ask me if we had sex and I’d say no cos for the first time ever it wasn’t that it was love.

There are places I remember
All my life, though some have changed
Some forever not for better,
Some have gone and some remain.
All these places had their moments,
With lovers and friends
I still can recall,
Some are dead and some are living,
In my life I've loved them all.
But of all these friends and lovers
there is no one that compares with you,
And these memories lose their meaning
When I think of love as something new,
Though I know I'll never lose affection
For people and things that went before,
I know I'll often stop and think about them,
But in my life I loved you more.

"Love is eternal. That is its terror and its final beauty. Love never ends. The joy may go out of it, and, in time, even the pain may end. But it lingers like a living thing and follows you every moment of your life"

"there is no despair so absolute as that which comes with the first moments of our first great sorrow,when we have not yet known what it is to have suffered and be healed,to have despaired and recovered hope"George Elliot

Monday, August 10, 2009

finally....

I have learnt that the trick to sucess, is to make sure every one else fails, if u want to get a job, be the best qualified for that position, make other applicants fail, if you wanna get a girl same thing applies, be everything she wants in a man, make every other guy inadequate, ergo make them fail, but i have come to see that there is an art to making them fail, cos if you are seen as undercutting the competition you might end up been seen as manipulative but when you take time out, and really think about it arent we all.
We do it in little ways reverse psychology or as Sun-Tzu said show them the potential gain, be like a shooting star always out of reach, seem unattainable, make them hunger with every fiber of their being, become entwined in their life, and then dissappear just like that trust me,it works every time.
To the ladies if you know what you want, why dont you just bleeding well say so rather than skulk around the bush like a @#$%^, But my fave move is to project what i want, as if i dont want it, it works all d time like i say to a girl
me:I dont think i'm the kind of guy u should fall in love with cos (list some some mad qualities)
girl:are you serious
me:yeah cos i wuldnt want to have u regret us being friends (or sthg (in)sensitive like that)

“You can’t always get what you want,But if you try sometimes, you might just find, you get what you need.” Rolling Stones.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Mi Famiglia(My Family) PT 1

I always wonder how, some people can say they grew up with 2 siblings, me I grew up with a veritable brood, @ the last count I had 6 brothers and 10 sisters (and now 1 nephew). Growing up in a hoise like that had its highs and lows like chow time if u are the last to the table it was a sure thing that your food would have been halved by the others if you get @ all, or when it was time to sleep if u dulled, and went to bed late, u go sleep for parlor, the only good thing was dat all the rooms had air conditioning, so i used to sleep in the bar on the pool table the felt was so soft lol.

There was this time when there was no light so Me and my brother had to go downstairs, and flip the switch to generator, but we were watching Omen when they took the light, I swear I saw a shadow gliding towards me, I just ran down the stairs, flipped the switch, jumped off the wall and zipped back up the stairs.

Not to sound like I'm boasting, but my brothers were playas of the highest caliber, and like the dragonballz, they were already saiyan when I got to know about women, so I've been saiyan ever since, anyhows I got the job of herding all their gfs around the house, so @ any one time there culd be 4 girls each for them, and it was my job to make sure that none of their paths ever crossed. And I was so good @ it that not once did my dad even know there where girls in his house all the time, or maybe he did but thot they were my sisters friends.

The first time i got to know that girls were more valuable as a commodity than boys was about 15 years ago, it was christmas period so my sisters wanted to get their hair done, my Pops is like okay here's 30 G's go do your hair and look good, and he sends off with 3 cars, and drivers. So I go up to him and say pops I wanna cut my hair he looks @ me, and goes into his room gives me a clipper, and 20 naira, and says theres a barber next door imagine...


PT 2 coming soon

thots

I love seeing girls all decked up to the 9's, in them skimpy clothes, but i hate it when a girl leaves her house, wearing afore mentioned apparel, and then starts to tug @ the hem. I'm like y u wear am comot if u no wan show skin, go figure.

Y do girls like to front, don' get me wrong,I like girls dat front but it gets boring if its too! much us guys are like 100 meter runners but girls go wan turn us to marathoners.

Why is it that when you are dating somebody some1 somewhere is crushing you like mad but when you call it off the person is over you.

Why do the nigerian police think its now the norm to be "sorted" they don't even ask for ur papers all they say s sort us and go.

Why is it easier to flirt over the phone than in person and even easier to do so with some1 you have never met.

Why am I even writing this I have work to do.....

Friday, July 10, 2009

The truth about........

Love and war are both related, In war you seek to conquer ur adversary, in love u seek to conquer a heart, In war you spend money, and time, in love u spend even more,
In war you must know when to press forward, and when to hold ground, in love u must know when to pursue, and when to use absence to increse attraction.
In war the use of spies is not only encouraged, it is a neccessity, in love use her friends to know what she likes, it saves you the trouble of having to wait for her to say.
all war is deception, showing ur adversary what he wants to see, in love (self explanatory).
Know thy self, know thy enemy. A thousand battles, a thousand victories.
Sun Tzu

Many a time I've had troubled dreams,
While wondering night's dark realms,
All around me I was beset by sorrow,
hope could not keep me for tomorrow.
Till I met an angel, and in that encounter,
all of life's negative impacts she countered,
all the tears I wept through the night into the day,
She came and wiped them all away.
She has me under a spell,
which haunts me more than I can tell,
I still don't understand how I fell,
How she's got me living like I'm in a prison cell,
She stole my heart with such grace,
now she has me wondering this unfamiliar place,
She pierced my heart with loves unwavering dart,
should she leave my life from me will surely depart.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Fusion

I havent put up a post in a while so here goes:

The past year has been full of tears and triumphs, finished uni and had my then baby (chu) all teary eyed about how she didnt know wat she'd do wivout me around (sob sob). I went 2 camp, and came back, and thats when she drops the bomb, and says she doesnt know wat she wants in a man, wat the fcuk i spent 3 weeks wiv girls who wanted to put out, but i had to be d faithful in scribs words morrasucker, so wat did i do acted like a girl went on a drinking spree got fucked up, but then I had an epiphany, Sam said she was innocent wen we met but dat didnt last long 'wink wink', so he figured I got d best end of the deal when she left me, rite wen i needed to be free.


I miss my friends, aka d baby clan allow me to introduce them: bald baby who was in his early 20’s but his fast receding hairline said 45, blind baby who stood 5ft6", the guy never said die, a real ladies man, plus he was active only @ night, when it was time 4 classes he slept. sometimes I wonder how he managed 2 graduate, broke baby this dude had Chinese eyes, and he never had money.jk. we used to say that if u put ur hands in his pockets, u'd find cobwebs lol, Scribs aka blabbing baby this guy culd talk, I av nevr met a guy who talks like this dude in my life, d only time I av seen him shut up was when 2 baba beat him @ pro6, bad baby this dude was d definition of rude most times we got into trouble it was cos of him he was my proj partner I ended up doing the project alone mscheew, brainless baby this guy was so slow he'd laff 30 minutes after we cracked a joke, but I think they were my realest friends @ uni if u guys read
this
burst the _______
scatter the _______
bullet the _______
feel cool in the_____

So Nysc, God a hellish yr all round. The high points were meeting girls like on a daily basis, hanging out wiv my guys, downing cold beer and eating suya, but evn that cant last cos now i av an obligation (check out the next para). The real world is a beautiful and scary place to be in, cos theres no safety net anymore, u get mo money, but u av more distractions (girls and stuvz), in school if u failed u rewrote d paper, but in the real world if u fail I shudder to evn think of dat hapenning.

So my sis graduated wiv a 1st class, i felt so proud of her cos evn though we fight like mad i still love her die and then 2 days l8r my other sis calls me and says Psy guess wat u r an uncle i'm like damn i'm getting older so his name is Chidiebube and he is d most beautiful thing I av ever seen 2 hands, 2 feet, 10 toes and fingers, 2 ears no teeth yet, brown eyes, perfection wiv a smile, I dont evn need to teach him how to be a playa took him out d other day to d mall and girls were falling all over themselves just to touch him and u guessed it he is now my wingman lol.Oh and i saw my ex and d nu guy she's dating 1 guy but he aint better than me I still rock her ........

I was listening to Raheem Devaughn's Woman today and these lines stuck
"I appreciate ur smile, and the 9 months it takes to carry, and birth a child......and evn as a single parent mama, u still hold it down somehow thank u Mama...Ucan av a big old car and a big old house but next to God nothing else amounts to a Woman" People go on about how this person or that person is the greatest influence in their life, for me that person is my mum the woman is my superhero, growing up she always had my back, and she still does. So to all mothers out there we love u pieces evn though we hate it when u get all up in our faces it cos we want to learn our own lessons i remeber my lil cuz playin near a lamp and we always carried him away one day no one was there and he touched it he never touched it again dats how mothers should be willing to let u go and ready 2 brush u off when u fall.


Thursday, June 11, 2009

Only in 9ja

I saw this guy on my way home 4rm work wearing a shirt tucked in, selling some towel holders for d bathroom as in d guy must av worked 9-5, and he still hit d streets to go hustling as soon as he gets off work, or u see people turning their cars to cabs for fuel money, or u see a 6 year old hawking pure water on the streets weaving in, and out of traffic like it was a ballet its only in 9ja.

Sad as it is they talk about the global economic crisis and how people r being laid off but in 9ja we av always had crisis and, we still dey buy cars, dey build houses, we dey go club dey pop bottles upon bottles, dey throw parry like say tommorow no dey, dey go spend summer for wherever come dey oppress u for ur own country sef na only 9ja.

Some people go dey feel bad say dem get pimples or their nose no straight, dem go just run mental carry guns fuck everybody up for school, or take razor slice him wrists, jump from bridge, make dem come 9ja see as things dey go, no light, no water, corruption is rife throughout the land, but still we keep grinding believing dat e go better..
Say wat u will about 9ja, but the truth is in d words of DJ Khaled "we taking over" but its one country at a time

9ja rules

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Still Cave men

a lot of people talk about love and how wonderful it is when u find that special one me i've found d secial one quite a lot in my 24 years i've been on earth 12 of those spent aware of women and in all at time i av come 2 realize dat men haven't changed from d cave man eraa we still love the chase in fact the chase is almost if not evrything wiv dat said lets get down to it;
Why r women so gullible its nice atimes but it culd be downright annoying at others i mean they never want to hear d truth right after she wakes up u better av a smile, a kiss, and a u r beautiful if u want some y cant a guy tell a girl his mind wivout having to think 4 steps down the line about potential fallout or or play war of warcraft rather than talk on the phone @ night or chill wiv ur boys and a beer rather than want to go out and SHOP in fact i don vex Homies over....... lol
Peaches i remember how it started txt messages late night phone calls i cut all my friends out just cos she always said she wasnt looking to date anytime soon so i spent my time and MY money going to her place hanging out and her saying she culdnt came visit me cos she felt safe in her house (imagine how chicken go feel safe for hen house wen fox dey inside too) we used to spend the weekends in each others company or she'd call me and i'd go sit wiv her @ d salon while she made her hair then I stepped it up one day she had icecream on her lip so I wiped it off wiv my finger and I culd feel her pulse speed up as her breathing hitched then I licked d ice cream off my finger and told her she tasted of peaches so i start priming her telling her dat i don't eat peaches b4 they r ripe and she tells me there is one guy dat wants 2 take her peaches (get it she started using my term for her lips so i knew i was home free) she asked if i had a girlfriend dat there was this girl she always used to see wiv me and i was like are u looking for a boyfriend (of which she was) and i was like she's my best friend but when i finally did get my peaches it wasnt all dat lol.
Scribs e be like say u no wan get respect again abi no be only alchohol u go drink u go chop spag wey dem cook wiv weed mscheew

Monday, June 8, 2009

welcome to me

Its funny how we meet peolple and never ave any idea wat they will mean 2 u let me just go thru a list of d people who av made my life wat it is 2day

1)Vanilla(wifey): my high school sweetheart even though its been 8 yrs thinking about her gets me a little shook up i cant breathe in d perfume of frangipani without picturing her smile or hearing her laughter

2)Hazel(boo): the other girl d 1st girl who made me see dat not all girls need to be wooed some of them are just dying 2 give it up 2 u but d cause of my estrangement 4rm Van

3)Princess(wifey): my kryptonite she was hot in d words odf d'banj o n gbona feli feli met thru a friend and 4 d 1st time a girl who was strong enuff to challenge me and soft enough 2 make me want to take care of her but it wasnt meant to be.

4)Ho:this guy was my dude and he still is just not a part of d baby clan me and him raised hell on campus especially amongst d females no be we fine pass but...................enu o se na God do am

5)The (original) baby clan: bad, bald, broke, bush, blind(dark neo), blabbing(scribbles), brainless, & black babyu made d final days of CU bearable these guys r my brothers we ate spag 2geda played halo 2geda pes6 man these boys were real we culd stay up just talking and stuff making plans on how we'd have it all someday.

6)Chu: she was perfect skin like caramel voice like a ,eyes like storm tossed seas i just want 2 drown in them,legs dat went on forever a smile dat made my day but it wasnt meant to last the only girl i av ever been content just 2 av around me but love wasnt enuff for us she wanted sthg more sthg i wasnt able to give

7)Peaches: met her while i was with chu but culdnt do a thing about it but her lips just made me think of peaches so d 1st time we kissed was like d last time we did it it turns out i was kinda allergic to peaches or they were allergic to me(not)

There r still so many people i cant mention but i will scribs d next blog is gonna b all aout u and ur evil deeds.
So make it a date and anybody who wants d skinny on scribbles its gonna b a 3 part mini series lol so tell ur friends dat sir scribs is about 2 get his.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Tears of the Moon

There was a girl I wuld av given it all up for evrythin I was and all dat I culd av been, & I thot she felt the same way. I always used to say to myself dat I wanted just one thing from her same as I wanted from evry other girl but it was different next thing I knew we'd take walks, hold hands I was a goner me who prIded myself on being worse than all of my bothers in affairs of the heart falling for a mere stripling how embarrassing so I introduced her(lets call her baby) to my mum dad d people who mattered to me, d baby clan.
When she called it quits I almost lost it went on a drinking spree dat lasted 3 days but dat was a lifetime ago its like i had an epiphany i was stuck wiv my heads in d clouds dreaming of d future and how it was going to be fine I was playing wiv poverty and didn't even know it I saw people who didnt av nothing kids begging in the streets grown men and women wiv nothing to do but try 2 survive and hope to die, Now there's no room for a woman in my life I'm all about d money. I'm all cried out now my smile's all people see

Thursday, June 4, 2009

The travails of Uni 1st yr

It felt so good 2 leave home finally if i had only known wat i was getting into chapel service like 3 times a week minimum public lectures (boring) d only thing dat made it evn bearable was d girls yes d girls so many of them 4rm all over so 1 quickly bcame a flirt (@ least i did) always in d company of women and 2 make it worse Revo and not being able to leave and let off some steam God looking back now i wonder how i survived dat year let alone graduated so over d nxt few posts u'll feel like u went 2 my school and Hate it almost as much as i did.

The case of the walkin money I went home(read as escaped) 4 a few days b4 matric and came back wiv a lot of money so i split it up (not 1 to put all my eggs in 1 basket) 5Gs here 10Gs there like dat sha anyhow went to bed d door was locked up tightr than a Virgin in Scribbles days lol and it was me and my roommates in d room so i woke up in d morning took d keys 2 d wardrobe and the lock just fell out (shock) and nxt thing i know 5Gs here 10Gs there bcomes 2gs here 4gs there woke my roomies up and they all swore they didnt see a thing omo i went all niger delta militant on them and we found the money in d bin of all places.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Past 1

I'm a 1st time blogger and I'm proud Its funny how time flies 1st i was d big chubby(read fat) kid in d neigbhourhood had evrything i ever wanted and cried when people called me fat but I remember my mum telling me dat I was better fed and they were suffering from lack running around wiv my best friend wish those days culd come back again.ok enuff wiv d reminiscing. some of d best and worst days of my life were in sceondary school(high school to u folks in d diaspora) i remember being scared of girls to thod=se of u who know me know like kay,sam, scribbles u'll be lik yeah write i remember there was a day i sat down bside 1 girl and i needed to use her eraser i had 2 send d message round half d class and she sant it via said route not knowing it was me until it came full circle damn i was foolish